Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
