The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
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