using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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