You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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