It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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