These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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