So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
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I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
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my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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