Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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