direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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