If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
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