super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra