Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
