Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
