i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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