you guys were way drunker than both of me
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
