do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Ketchup is God's man juice
Just took my morning after pill in the library
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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