Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Randomize
