I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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