Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Randomize
