Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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