when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize