at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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