Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Randomize
