Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
