why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Randomize
