I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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