lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
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One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
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Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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