East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
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