so that wasnt chicken after all
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I think a kid would responsible me up
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Randomize