Texts From Last Night

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  (419): View more from Ohio

  You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....

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  (419): You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean..... http://tfl.nu/ti18
  Replies (14) Good night (4805) Bad night (735)
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was

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  (514): I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was http://tfl.nu/5j8j
  Replies (14) Good night (6949) Bad night (3142)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.

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  (813): I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me. http://tfl.nu/z6eo
  Replies (36) Good night (19725) Bad night (1543)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.

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  (845): i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now. http://tfl.nu/ygdu
  Replies (12) Good night (985) Bad night (3305)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  this is really not the time to pretend we have morals

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  (704): this is really not the time to pretend we have morals http://tfl.nu/j8ot
  Replies (10) Good night (4818) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.

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  (256): I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self. http://tfl.nu/pw1v
  Replies (5) Good night (4610) Bad night (898)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.

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  (+61): You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd. http://tfl.nu/nwi3
  Replies (16) Good night (4838) Bad night (852)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.

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  (610): I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun. http://tfl.nu/gl1b
  Replies (6) Good night (1579) Bad night (1123)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him

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  (202): when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him http://tfl.nu/8eei
  Replies (7) Good night (2268) Bad night (812)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.

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  (651): I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober. http://tfl.nu/gztw
  Replies (5) Good night (1409) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.

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  (916): I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly. http://tfl.nu/j9zm
  Replies (2) Good night (976) Bad night (483)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song

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  (908): Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song http://tfl.nu/uwq0
  Replies (13) Good night (1379) Bad night (493)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.

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  (720): She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that. http://tfl.nu/2gzq
  Replies (15) Good night (410) Bad night (1546)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  So, were they human bite marks at least?

  (434): View more from Virginia

  Your guess is as good as mine.

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  (617): So, were they human bite marks at least? (434): Your guess is as good as mine. http://tfl.nu/gi39
  Replies (5) Good night (768) Bad night (360)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me

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  (530): Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me http://tfl.nu/1ycp
  Replies (4) Good night (243) Bad night (574)

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