Texts From Last Night

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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work

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  (630): Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work http://tfl.nu/uouq
  Replies (16) Good night (1010) Bad night (3928)
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  (631): View more from New York

  I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis

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  (631): I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis http://tfl.nu/1ywh
  Replies (17) Good night (4587) Bad night (671)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes

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  (519): dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes http://tfl.nu/xjd2
  Replies (61) Good night (6283) Bad night (1112)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.

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  (419): we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it. http://tfl.nu/duoc
  Replies (37) Good night (3520) Bad night (4776)
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  (415): View more from California

  Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.

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  (415): Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only. http://tfl.nu/ffub
  Replies (7) Good night (4911) Bad night (1097)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that

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  (641): i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that http://tfl.nu/t0hz
  Replies (22) Good night (5503) Bad night (1396)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.

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  (303): She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan. http://tfl.nu/jf6q
  Replies (41) Good night (11891) Bad night (2162)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor

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  (780): A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor http://tfl.nu/h37q
  Replies (14) Good night (2702) Bad night (1032)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.

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  (570): Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone. http://tfl.nu/7xsv
  Replies (6) Good night (1536) Bad night (613)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  You need to not admit that.

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  (513): We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix (1-513): You need to not admit that. http://tfl.nu/r8yn
  Replies (2) Good night (1304) Bad night (904)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.

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  (416): BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT. http://tfl.nu/cryj
  Replies (5) Good night (809) Bad night (390)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!

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  (775): Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii! http://tfl.nu/sf3q
  Replies (4) Good night (611) Bad night (552)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.

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  (613): I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun. http://tfl.nu/gqms
  Replies (2) Good night (235) Bad night (576)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.

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  (206): You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate. http://tfl.nu/3z68
  Replies (4) Good night (1162) Bad night (243)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I've been vomiting all day.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  All day? It's 10am.

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  (313): I've been vomiting all day. (248): All day? It's 10am. http://tfl.nu/2bv9
  Replies (5) Good night (450) Bad night (257)

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