I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
