Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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