I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I just had sex on a roof
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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