her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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