O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
