Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
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