Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
