Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
This baby is an asshole
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize