I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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