butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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