jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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