I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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