"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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