PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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