I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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