I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Randomize
