if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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