Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
