Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize