just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
it wasn't lemon gatorade
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
