pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
