so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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